Hair Chronicles

From the stories I've heard,  I was basically bald until around age 3. After that my mom says my hair just kinda sprouted. I remember I was six, sitting in the kitchen of our apartment getting my hair relaxed. The only thing I could do was be still and watch the kids play out back through our screendoor.

I know people do what they feel is in the best interest of their children, but personally I'd never relax my child's hair. Honestly it just takes time to learn what works for their hair, and through time you will also learn how to manage it.

I always thought I had nappy hair. To be clear there's no type of "Good Hair" so miss me with that foolishness. But growing up, I didn't know any better. I hated that my hair rolled up and parked in my "kitchen" and I didn't understand why my hair was always so dry. I just knew the moment my roots started to puff up, it was that time. 

I had chemical burns so many times because I let the relaxer sit too long. Which was a part of the reason why my hair in the back was always broken off.  A lot of the times we didn't have the whole kit, just the jar of you can imagine the damage that was done to my hair throughout the years. Thankfully my hair still managed to be thick and somewhat resilient to these "No Lye" relaxers.

Girl bye.

Early on I figured out why my hair was always so dry. My mom never used conditioner. So the shampoo was clarifying my hair til no end, and I had absolutely no moisture to seal back into my strands.


In middle school, I wore a ponytail most times. I would slap some Blue Magic through my hair, around my edges and some water.....and brush the crap out of my hair. Just to pull it into a low ponytail. I had to be sure to lay it down using a scarf tied so tight, I had headaches the next morning. I went through a long ugly phase with my hair during that time.

Then along came Michelle.

I met Michelle at the first high school I attended.  She was obsessed with hair. *She is now a successful cosmestologist*. We were so tight, she kept my hair looking amazing! And for free thankfully, because your girl was broke as a joke!

With Michelle doing my hair, I noticed that I was able to stretch the length of time I got my relaxers. From every six weeks, to every 3 or 4 months. My hair flourished, even when I switched schools.

Then I cut it.

My next door neighbor was a beautician. Not a good one, but at the time I didn't know any better. I went up to her shop one day and told her I wanted a bob and a burgundy rinse. Mind you my hair was a pretty decent length, about bra strap.

She cut it.

She charged an arm and leg. It wasn't a bob, more like a mushroom.  My Mom and Grandma were tight. I basically had to tell them they weren't with me shooting in the gym, so bye chile.

Then I missed my hair, so I let it grow back. Only to have to cut it again in college.

Dear Dudley beauty school, WHHHHHHHYYYYYY would you allow someone to bleach their hair knowing how hard it would be to maintain it on a college persons budget?????

My hair fell smooth out!

Just at the top, but I was looking a fool, wearing different protective styles until it grew back.

Then here comes Bennie.

I don't know WHAT happened during my pregnancy but my hair was long, full, healthy and blowing in the wind! You couldn't tell me a thing!

A few years later,

My cousin decided to go natural, then her sister, then I decided to jump on the bandwagon.

I wasn't ready.

I did NOT big chop.

My head is too big and my ears are too little, I was NOT about that life. So I transitioned. It was sooooo hard!!!!

I will recommend anyone going natural to have an idea of how you want to wear your hair. I was a hot mess. I assumed I'd just get a blow out every month, not realizing I was prolonging when I'd see my natural curl pattern.

I had so much heat damage from transitioning, and I was adding to it, by putting heat on my hair as frequently as I did.

I want you to know that my stylist did warn me, over and over and over again. (Thanks Elisa!)

One day I decided no more blowouts, except when I go for a trim. I learned how to use flexi rods and started doing twist outs. 


That process was sooooooooooo tedious! I was re-doing my hair every single night. Why? I had so many inches of straight hair, it wouldn't curl on the ends.

I think this is why I became "The Lazy Natural" or one of them rather. Transitioning wore me out.

In my real life, I was going through several transitions as well. I became frustrated with my hair.

I cut it again. 

One day in June 2015 I said screw it. I was so sick of those straggly ends, I just starting cutting my hair. Knowing NOTHING about my hair type or curl pattern. I jacked my hair all the way up. I kept cutting until my hair would curl, not realizing that I had like 4 different hair types.

During this phase, I rocked a puff, thug passion braids (2 cornrows to the back), and my baby dreads (2 strand twists) for the next year.

It grew back.

Now here we are, my hair is a decent length and I still cut it on my own when it starts to get on my nerves lol. I don't go for trims as regularly as a I should, because my stylist is still in my home city. I refuse to trust anyone here. My hair still gets dry, but that is because I am lazy with refreshing it.

Overall I love my hair, and going natural has been the best thing I could have ever done for my hair. I love my hair big, wild, and all over the place. I love that I can literally manipulate it however I please. I love how on the day before wash day, (about 2 or so weeks in LOL) I still get compliments on my hair.  I feel like my hair is a representation of who I've been an who I am becoming.

You have to learn your hair, just like having to learn who you are as an individual. Stay the course, yours may be similar to someone else, but specific to you only.




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